Re: Re: wife or girlfriend support

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#22586

r-at-work
Member

another female point of view… my husband is not a runner, but he goes to the gym 4-5 times a week and understands fitness, focus and goals… it's the second marriage for both of us and all of our kids were into sports and fitness is importantto all of us… so is “our time” so occasionally I end up going somewhere after a long run when I'd rather take a nap, sometimes I take a nap…

he has driven me to out of town marathons, but is not going to Boston as my sister said she would meet me there and he feels that he has been supportive of my goal of the BQ… the BEST thing he has done was when I ran a PR but not nearly a BQ and told me how proud he was of me, and how it was a great first step in my “three year plan”… at the time I didn't HAVE a three year plan, but with him saying that, it made me feel as if I had a plan and it was going well…

he tells me I motivate him to go to the gym on days he doesn't feel like going… I feel the same way about him motivating me… he has bought me gear, books, printed out entry forms and told me about races he has 'heard' about…

on the other hand my first husband thought just about everything I did was a waste of time if it didn't put him at the center… once (after he had divorced me)he asked me why I had joined a running group and was running at the track, my answer was “because I could”… he wanted to know what I was “trying to prove”… I said I was just trying to “improve” not “prove” anything… some people never get it…

as others have said “balance” is the key… I have never asked my husband to go to any of my shorter races, I try to plan WAY ahead for all of my races, I do go to track two mornings a week and there is that long run on (usually) Saturday, but that's his morning to sleep in , go to the gym then fix himself a big breakfast and read the paper… I know I'm lucky and I tell him that all the time… oh yeah and both of us work 40 hours…
-Rita